9/9/2011 5:21 PM Life Just Keeps Getting Better

Where to start?! Wow... God is... too good? Like, there is absolutely no way you can deny divine orchestration here... I feel normal. Not because nothing happened, but because SO much has happened, I think my mind just like, broke. My emotional system got a headache, said "screw it" and went in the back room to take a nap. It's almost surreal, except my fist still hurts from punching the stupid punching bag machine-game the other night. So... Yeah. 'Life changing' doesn't really begin to describe it.

I just went out and bought some energy drinks, candy and Flaming Hot Fries to celebrate and get this stuff blogged! :)

Ok, ok... So, I had my alarm set to wake me up at 7:30am. Rebecca was telling me that she planned on being at my mom's at 9am (my time, 10pm her's)... But, I got a text from her at 7:20am telling me that my bro would be picking her up in ten minutes... Yikes! So I got up, showered and cleaned up and stuff. As soon as I got to my computer, I literally just got her IM asking me to get on Skype.

Well, first... Tech didn't quite treat us very well. We were gonna video chat, but you can't video chat over Skype to a phone... So, it was all audio. We were kinda pressed, so we didn't bother sitting around and figuring that out. Then... The Skype call kept lagging and dropping and doing weird stuff. Conversation was kinda hard b/c we had to speak through Rebecca... She was IMing me the translation while my mom and bro talked on the phone. Not at all saying she did anything less than great, but I had to wait for translation and by the time I got it and wanted to say something, they were already talking about something else... Then when I wanted to say something, I had to type it to Rebecca and also try to say it at the same time (that's harder than you think).

Ok, well, that was kinda rough. It sort of made conversation a little awkward.... But............

But...

Gosh... I heard my mom for the first time... She grabbed the phone and was immediately crying and just said "Chang-gi' over and over... She told me that she was sorry; that she loved me and that she never forgot about me, even in her dreams. She said she had been praying for me, and that she loves me so much... She said that two days after she left me at Holt, she went back to go get me, but they had already sent me off to a foster home. She was weeping so bitterly... So kept calling me "son" and kept saying my name... She told me not to be lonely anymore, that she wanted to cook kimchi and bulgolgi for me. She wants to do my laundry; that she wants to do everything for me... She wants to make up for everything she couldn't do for me... She was worried about me being too skinny. She thought maybe I was sick... She told me to eat a lot of food. Then she called my bro a pig. :P Haha... Then she said I was more handsome than my brother, and tall and gorgeous... (Poor bro... Haha... ) She really wanted to hear my voice, so I just said 'umma...' She wanted me to say anything... Just make noises. Anything... I tried to say something... But, like I mentioned above, it was kinda difficult. She told me that she will see Hyewon (Rebecca) in place of me, and then said she was pretty. :) She said she always looked for me, that she misses me and that she regretted giving me up so much. She said she saw adoptees programs (where kids found their parents) and wished she could have a miracle like that. She said she could not imagine how alone I was, and how I struggled. She said she was sad beyond description...

And then...

My bro got on the phone said, "don't ride a bike!"

Hahaha....

He said, "thank you" for growing up and he was really happy to find me... And that I am not alone anymore, and that he'll always be there for me, and Hyewon will be there for me, too. He said that when he was young, he wanted to be successful so he could find me... (Note: My brother didn't know I existed until my dad was about to die, then he talked about me. After, my brother was really curious and wanted to find me.) And also... don't ride a bike! He said I was lucky to have found Hyewon, and that she was so pretty, and, "...man, you're a lucky guy!"

Mom got back on the phone and told me to eat. :P She said I worry her... Then she said I should be fat. :P She wanted me to tell her what I want to eat when we meet... I told her, "spicy food... Spicy Korean food!" and they all laughed... :)

Then my bro got back on the phone and told me he was gonna shave my mustache... Well, change my hairdo first. :P (I just got this junx cut, yo! Aiiii... Haha...) But, then he said my mustache was like my dad, so he would just trim it, not shave it. He said that we love each other and we can share everything. Like, music... We talked a little about X-Japan...  (Note: X-Japan is a famous, 80's metal-ish band from Japan... Kind of an 'acquired taste' kind of band, and I've actually never met another fan of X-Japan in person... But, fans are hard-core. When they broke up, many people committed suicide over the news!) He said that I was like 'another him'... Except we look different. Then my mom shouts that I look much better! Haha... They told me not to drink, and not to smoke... My bro said that when I go to Korea, he was going to give me his car! Not casually, either... He was really serious. (I really don't think I could take his car! Ai-ya... I will like driving it, though. :) I'm sure he tuned it well!) He said to just come... And mom would cook me a lot of Korean food... Then he said he wanted to take a shower together. :S (Note: In Korea, that's not weird... That's normal. Rebecca still found this amusing. :P I.... might... have to pass on that one... Haha....)

Then... (poor Rebecca) my mom started threatening Rebecca... She told her (and not casually) that if she breaks up with me, that she'll never get married... anywhere... :P Haha... (She actually did this several times that night, apparently... Hehehe...) She said if Rebecca breaks up with me and finds another guy, that she'll go to him and tell him what she did to me... Whelp. Rebecca's now stuck with me. Thanks, mom! :D

I asked my bro if he were dating... Then he said, 'yes' (sorry girls) but my mom had a disapproving look on her face... He said that mom only likes Rebecca... Haha...

They asked if I was safe from the earthquake and the hurricane. I told 'em that the earthquake was just a little shake, and the 'hurricane' was just a lot of rain. Then I told them that DC was pretty safe, and I don't speed anymore (well, it's only been a month, but hey. :P ) and that I never smoked, or did drugs... But do like beer. They were really relieved. I told them I always tried to be good, and I got good grades, and I was good to my parents. They were really happy to hear, and my bro said I was 'better than him'... Then he asked what I wanted for my birthday, and that he wanted to mail me something. Then he told me again, if I go to Korea, he'll give me his car...

I told them I just wanted to see them... That all I wanted was a guitar, the three of them in that room and nothing else...

Mom got back on the phone, and told me not to ride a motorbike. :P She said my bro got in trouble... (Turns out, my dad actually rode bikes, too! But something bad happened with him and he got rid of it/them...) Then she said my voice is the same as my bro's (mine's more deep, but his has the same 'softness' that mine does). She was in awe that we were raised in different environments but have managed to turn out so similar.

But, then she was saying how my personality is her's... She said that she is really a perfectionist; that she is obsessed with perfection. She said she could tell that I am the same by my work (last night, they went through all my Facebook pictures and were looking at my guitars and stuff). She said my sense of responsibility is from her, and that she knows that I have integrity because 'I am her.' She told me to call her 'umma'... She wanted to hear me call her 'umma' many times because I never had the chance to before... Then she asked if it were morning. She said that from now on, my body is her's, so I should be healthy. She said not to enjoy 'the speed,' that she enjoyed speed too (imagine that, my mom a speeder? Runs in the family!) but not to do it anymore... Then she told me to eat breakfast. :P

So... That's kind of where the conversation ends... (Had stupid Skype/internet troubles.) Rebecca told me that they were gonna get me a round-trip ticket to Korea, and they wanted to see me on my birthday! Woo-hoo! So soon... Guess I'm gonna get to Korea again before Rebecca comes here. Wooooow! I was praying someone would get me a ticket... Prayer answered!

Rebecca said that they were all actually in the office... Guess it was after hours, and my bro just brought Rebecca there. They took some pics w/Rebecca's iPhone.

 Umma at her desk... She's the director!

Rebecca was complaining that all the pictures were bad, b/c everyone's eyes were all puffy from crying so much... My stepdad was actually there for all of this, and he took these pics. More on him, later!

...But, she made everyone smile for this one. Doesn't she look cute next to my mom??? Also, don't my mom and bro look a lot more like me in this pic?

So... They took Rebecca out to eat lots of delicious Korean food. They wanted to stuff her on my behalf. My mom reallllly likes her. Rebecca said that they really treated her like a daughter. She said that she never felt that kind of love from a stranger, and that she really felt like she was family... I told her that that is how I felt the whole time I was in Korea with my host family and with the churches... I'm so glad she got to experience that! She said that the first conversation was a lot of crying and stuff, but dinner conversation was a lot of laughing... She said it was a really happy time. She said my family is really nice... She was telling me how my stepdad said if she ever wanted to eat some good food, that she should just call him up. She said my mom was really adamant about seeing her as frequently as possible (turns out Rebecca only lives 10 minutes away from their home! How perfect is that?)... And then she said my bro told her... If some guy follows her around, or harasses her, or hits on her, that he'd 'kick his ass'... Yeah, bro!!!! Rebecca is really pretty... And I know she's walking all over Seoul alone, so I worry about her, b/c I can't do anything 7000 miles away... So, this made me really happy. :) They are all really protective of me, and also really protective of Rebecca. Thankful for my bro! Thankful for all of them... I get a new family, and so does Rebecca. :)

Of all the things to give praise to God for... This one really tops it for me. My adoption papers stated my parents were Buddhist... And my bro is not a Christian.... So, I was worried about that... And I was really, really going to press that the only reason I got to meet my family, and that I am even alive, is because of Jesus. Well... As you can see in the conversation, I didn't really get a chance to say any of that... Last night, I was talking to Rebecca, and asked her if she would take my mom and bro to church if I talked them into going. She was unsure... She thought maybe it would be too soon, or even kind of rude to bring it up, but I still got her to agree. However... My Rebecca is amazing, and God is really just too good... At dinner, she was asked how she knew how to speak English so well. So, she shared her testimony about how God gave her her ability to speak English (yeah, you read that right)... And that opened their hearts a little. But, then she was talking about how we met, and how I had just gone on my trip to Korea. They asked how that happened and where I stayed, and she explained to them that it was all hosted and provided by church people. They were amazed! They were so surprised to hear how much good the church was doing, and when Rebecca was talking about CK and Youngchai, and how they hosted me for two weeks, they were really grateful and wanted to meet them, too... This opened their hearts even more... Then Rebecca told them, 'actually, Chang-Ji wanted you all to go to church...'

...

Their response?

Mom said she was actually thinking about going to church before all this! Now that this has happened, she seems really willing to go! I was thinking, you know, my mom would probably be willing to go because of all this... I mean, how can you deny that God was involved here? Like... Even if you say finding my family, which only happened because I found Rebecca, was just 'chance'... The only reason I met Rebecca was because I got to go to Korea in the first place, which was because of church people... Which, really, is because of God. So... yeah. But, my brother, though, I was a little worried about. You know, young and stuff... Thought maybe he might need a bit more time than mum. But, no! He was thinking about going to church, too!! God is just too good! Now that they know about me, and all this stuff just happened, they seem like they're gonna go! I can't believe it was so easy! It's like... God did all the hard work to make it easier for Himself - however that is supposed to make  any sense. :P Wow! I was so worried about that... I thought this was going to take time and effort... But, like Rebecca says, 'God is in a hurry these days...' Rebecca is so good... She set the conversation up just right to place 'church' in all this when I didn't get a chance. Man! Prayers answered right there... It's like, God, You are too good to Yourself! Haha...

But... Things get even crazier...

Ok, so, Rebecca, mom and bro have been getting a lot of spotlight... Let's turn our attention to the guy who was just watching... My stepdad. My stepdad is actually quite amazing. HE was actually the one who offered to buy my plane ticket. Mom and bro were discussing how they'd get me over there, and he just stepped in and offered to buy the ticket!

See... Before I left for Korea, my friends and I were all joking and fantasizing about all the good things that could happen while I was in Korea... Stuff like, you know... That I would find a wife... And that I would find my parents... And my dad would like, own a big company and be super-rich... And that I would get like, 'adoption reparations' or something... You know, just like, wishful thinking. Well, there is nothing too big for God... And those kinds of things are definitely within His realm of ability. But, you know... You kind of think that God's only going to give you doses of blessings here and there... You know, give 'reasonable' blessings. So... While things were really 'fantastical' while I was in Korea, and still even more so after finding my family, finding out that my dad had died ten years ago kinda brought me back to 'reality,' I guess. I mean, my parents were so poor they had to stick me up for adoption.

But, enter my stepdad. My stepdad actually owns the company that my mom works for... He used to own a  good-sized company (~150 people) and used to be really rich, but some things went down, and he had to downsize, so the company is about 30 people now. But, though he owns it, he still made my mom director! And... he is also still pretty well-off financially.... And he's also really generous, as you can tell by my mom getting the 'director' title when he owns the company. Well... Here's where it gets rich. So, my stepdad is a thoughtful, problem-solving kinda guy. He seems to have spoken in a practical manner the whole time, and he kept bugging Rebecca about whether I finished school or not. She kinda shied away from the question the first time, but eventually she told him I hadn't finished... He told her that he would support me until I finished school! He's gonna help me finish school! He said that he would help me graduate, then he'd help me get a job over in Korea and make some real money... He has connections with like, Samsung (don't quote me on this, I don't know details for sure, yet) and other big companies and can definitely help me get a real job. Many, many details and things to be worked out about that... But, he's willing. My adoptive stepdad never thought about that... My adoptive mom and my adoptive dad never thought about that... And here, my stepdad, is going to help me. I'm not even his kid! He owes me nothing! He only married my mom four years ago... He's got a son (who speaks really good English, and apparently is tall and skinny like me) and two daughters of his own (they all grew up and moved out already)... But, he's going to help me!

Can you believe it? Wow...............................

So... Let's go back to the beginning of this blog. First entry, all the way at the bottom, under 'Some Prophetic Thingers.' I was talking about how Pastor Shin was prophetically praying over me, and he said that 'God would restore all the things that were taken from me and destroyed'... Well, BAM. There ya have it. God is not a liar! This year... God has given me the experience of a lifetime in Korea... He has shown me how unconditional His love is... He has shown me grace. He has shown me mercy. He has blessed me with surrogate families in Korea... He has blessed me with an amazing, beautiful (hot) girlfriend. He has restored my family... He has given me the best friends ever to celebrate all this with... And now... He has made a way for me to finish school and get on with my life.

When my mom was telling me that she loves me, and that she never forgot about me, even in her dreams... I really felt like God was saying the same thing to me. All those times I was depressed and begging God to tell me where He was... All those times I was really on the edge, the end of my rope... God is now telling me that He was there. He never forgot me... He loves me... And now that those times have passed, He is going to do everything for me... He is going to 'make it up' to me...

Can I have an 'amen?' A 'hallelujah?' My God... is surely too awesome... Too amazing... Everything... I mean, everything... was gone before. I have done nothing... I can take credit for none of this. All the glory, all the praise and all the goodness to my one, true, loving Father... Wooooo!! What's better? There is more to come! God is not finished!!

Exciting times in the life of Snake... :) I'll keep ya posted. :)

9/9/2011 12:07 AM My Dad

Ok, well, not too much too big happened last night... But, Rebecca got some pictures of my dad!

This was taken just the other day. My mom and bro went to go visit my dad's tomb... That's my mom! 

And... do I really have to say that's my dad? Like... My mom was kinda a surprise, but, wow...

I kept staring at all of our pics in different windows and got fed up, so I put together a little family collage... Isn't it something?

Well, in a few hours... I will be speaking to my mother and my brother for the first time... Time to get some good sleep and get ready for this!!

9/8/2011 12:56 PM My Bro

Ahhhh... So much to write about!

I am so happy these days... So happy that I feel like all the stuff I went through earlier, all the struggles I have, like... didn't even happen. I keep hearing bits and pieces from Rebecca about my mom and my brother... Gosh, I love my mom so much already... And she is protective of me, too. Poor Rebecca... She told her, kinda sternly, that she better not break up with me and that she should 'be nice to me'... Haha... Now, she's stuck with me. :) I am so thankful... Even in my informal tone and array of vocabulary and expressions, I really can't describe how I feel right now... It sounds stupidly obvious, but I really do feel like I just 'found my family'... I mean, I guess it's possible to meet your family and maybe feel like they're not your 'family' but just your 'creators?' I have no idea... After watching so many accounts of other adoptees meeting their parents, sometimes adoptees end up experiencing a 'second loss' upon meeting their parents. Not so with me... I am... I feel more complete, or something.

Some 'boring' details first... Well, my case worker at Holt sent me an e-mail with some more details about things.  She told me that she used some government resources to find their contact info, and that they came to visit on the 6th. She gave me a couple more details that I didn't get before... My father had hepatocirrhosis, and while he recovered after I was adopted, he still had liver issues and died of liver cancer 10 years ago. But, four years ago,  my mom married another guy, and my brother still lives with them. In any case, both my mom and brother hand-wrote me a letter and my case worker scanned them and sent them to me. Of course... Now I have Rebecca, and they know this at Holt now, too... So, I guess I'm done with them? We'll see if there are any formalities, but I don't think they can do much else for us, now... Rebecca is going to translate the letters for me. She already got to read them... I mean, she cried reading them... So, I'm probably gonna need some tissues. :P I don't think I cried this much my whole life! :P Snake is getting soft...

But, Rebecca got to talk to my mom on the phone this time... She was actually the one who asked Rebecca to translate it. She cried a lot... Especially after finding out I was always the only Asian growing up and stuff. She cried enough to make Rebecca cry, too... :P She said she couldn't imagine how lonely and tough it must have been for me. I know she struggled too... But, I am so happy to have found them now, that I don't really care about what's been done... I just want to be with her... Anyways, she was very pressing on meeting Rebecca, so Rebecca is actually going to go meet them tomorrow. She's going to set up a Skype call, and I'm going to get to talk to my mom and my brother for the first time...

How do I feel? I'm... excited... nervous... I dunno. It's... like, what do you expect? What can you expect? I just know I have to...

Rebecca is also excited... But, seems like she's even more nervous than I... She feels like she's under a lot of pressure, since this is pretty important stuff. I am so grateful for her and her willingness to make things work... Since this post is live, it'd be cool if you wanna lift up a quick prayer for her. I'll be praying for her, too (duh)... She's in a pretty clutch position, admittedly... Still, there is no person I would rather have in her position right now. I definitely want her by my side when I meet them in person....

But... In the meantime, I got some more info on my brother. He's like... exactly like me... Except much better looking. :P I friended him on Facebook, and got some more details from Rebecca...

He looks like a freakin' K-movie star or something... :S Not fair...!! Haha... But, that's what he said when he learned how tall I was.... But, really... He got all the looks in the family! Ahh... My dad must have been the one responsible for my complexion. :( Haha... I feel like I got the shallow end of the gene pool. :P Also, all the girls on his friend list all look like movie stars or something. It doesn't look like a normal friend list, but more like a K-pop directory or something. :S Dag... Sensitive-Personal-Whine-Moment: I always thought I was like, really ugly until I got my first girlfriend... Then I thought maybe I was just average. But, I have a beautiful mom, and my brother is already making my female friends drool... So... * shakes fist at dad *... Haha... Anyways, maybe if I 'Korean-ize' a little more, I'll get there, too.

Well, from the last post, you know he's into car tuning... But, he's also really into rock music! He was the singer for a rock band... Rebecca was telling me how he said he felt like he wanted to cry when he was looking through my photos on Facebook and saw my guitars. Crazy... If you don't know, Koreans aren't really into car-tuning b/c the government laws were previously very strict about that kind of thing... And then Koreans are usually 'softies' when it comes to music, so rock fans are pretty rare. So... The fact that he likes these things is really something else. He really likes spicy food, too... Rebecca said that when she told him that I really like spicy food, he said, "that dude must be my bro!" :)

I've never really met anyone like me, ever... All my car friends are different... All my art friends are really different... Same for my music friends, and my Korean friends, etc, etc. But, my brother is just like me! I feel like I just met my best friend. Both my brother and mom say that I get all that arty, fixing and tinkering stuff from my dad... I always thought hobbies and stuff were environmentally developed... But, I guess maybe some of these things can be programmed into your blood, somehow.

In a sort of weird way... I think I might have it easier than some other adoptees who meet their parents. I am so disconnected from my adoptive parents that when I see myself, I see myself as an orphan. I don't (well, didn't) feel like I had parents... So, in that sense... Now that I am meeting my mother and my brother... I feel like I'm being reunited with my family, and am not 'torn' between birth and adoptive parents. It's a really confusing experience for adoptees, and adoptive parents get really jealous and protective... But, I don't have to deal with any of that. I've found my umma... It's as simple as that.

9/7/2011 11:07 AM An Update... Quite an Important Update, at That...

Well..... I woke up this morning to the surprise of my life... I was barely awake, and checked my computer to look something up really quick, and Rebecca IM'd me: "Daniel... I found your brother."

Wow... It took a moment for the surprise to settle in.

Just last night (our night), I had asked her about my brother's name. I had tried finding him on Facebook before, but no luck. I was searching only using English... I thought maybe I should try using Hangul. But, I wasn't sure what the Hangul was, so I had asked Rebecca. She gave me the correct characters, but then did a search on Cyworld for 'Huh Chang-Wook' (in Hangul, obviously). She msg'd every guy that came up that was about our age... This was just last night... She got some responses, but nothing concerning me.

But, this morning (her evening), she got back to me... She had talked to my brother on the phone! She asked some good questions... And got my brother's Cyworld and mini-page and stuff. She got some pictures, too...

So... My mother is healthy and well, and it seems my brother is doing well, too. My father, though, passed away when I was 15-16 (maybe even 17? Gotta get clarification on the age). I kind of had a feeling about that... But, Rebecca was able to send my brother some pics of me. He says I look a lot like my father! He apparently looks a lot more like my mother, though. They were really excited to hear about me and glad to hear I am ok and not angry at them. Haha... And then they were asking about her! Funny...

So, she is going to go visit them. They live in Seoul, about 20 minutes away from where I was staying! She's gonna go visit during Chuseok and give them some gifts and talk. She gets to meet my parents first! Kinda funny, but she gets to meet my parents before I do.

So... Pictures!

That would be my brother... I don't have a more recent pic yet, but should get plenty, soon. He definitely looks like my brother! I looked quite similar when I was that age. ...And that would be my mom. She was hot! Haha... Somebody already asked, 'so, what happened to you?' :P

Not sure how recent these next two pics are... But, that's my mum. First... She looks nothing like I would have thought... My first thought was, 'I don't look anything at all like her!' And second, she looks younggggg... I know these pics might be a little older... But, she should be 48-49 now! But... That is my mom... You shouldn't have to wait 25 years to see your mom for the first time......

She looks like a college student! She is very pretty... I felt shock at first... I was expecting like, an old, wrinkled ahjumah or something... I guess that's how most adoptees find their parents? But, 48-49 really isn't that old... And... well, she looks young! I still can't believe she is my mom... But, that's her...

I post this pic b/c it's a pretty straight-on pic of my face... There is some resemblance (even if it's only a tiny bit), don't you think? Just a little. But, in hearing that I look mostly like my dad... I really want to see what he looked like... My brother said I was tall and handsome... I can't wait to hear more about my mom...

And, if you know me, this will make you laugh... But, this is my brother's car! He's really into car tuning!!

It looks pretty good! Tastefully done, thankfully... Haha... I hear he designs jewelry, and he's kinda artsy, too.

If you don't know me that well, well, here was my car:

Blood is thicker than water, no? Wow... Just wow... (If you're wondering, I'm sure my car woulda whipped his! Hehe... Then again, he didn't blow his up. :P )

Anyways... I was on Skype with Rebecca when I looked at these pics... I am so thankful for her, and for God just doing things the way He does. How perfect could it be? We're both shocked at how quickly He is moving... My excitement is sky-high, and my emotions are all over the place... Definitely a day to celebrate!

God willing, I hope I can get a chance to visit soon...

Well... I will be updating as things go along... So, this blog isn't ready to be closed any time soon. :)

9/6/2011 1:30 PM Life as it Goes On...

Well... It has almost been a month since leaving Korea... Life has almost returned to 'normal' - I mean, it's work-work-work, again. Some things are remarkably different. :)

Right after the trip, I had a bit of reverse-culture shock as soon as I landed in Georgia on layover. I was first shocked to see so many black people... And then shocked to see how much bigger Americans are. :S It was... a weird feeling. But, then I was also taken by how rude everybody seemed. As soon as I got home and I sort of got situated again, I went off to a wedding reception (Lisa &  Colin's). I was still really sad about leaving everybody in Korea, and then with my new disgust at being back home, I really needed to see my friends again. I put on my sharp, new suit from Dongdaemun and rode my bike over to the after party (it was so late, I didn't make it to the reception). I walked in and was promptly greeted by a stream of 'booooo's from BFF'ers (my church small group)... Haha... Everyone was complimenting how good I looked in my suit and was asking lots of questions about Korea. I was really happy to see everyone again, but I was really moping (more on that, later), so it was probably tough for anyone to tell. Had church the day after, and I think seeing all my friends and church family got me over the culture shock pretty quickly. The jet-lag, though, was a completely different story. That took like, two weeks to get over...

Before all of this, I really hated 'sharing my testimony' because I felt like it was really dry and boring... About how I grew up in church, thought I accepted Christ at six or something, then later had to rededicate myself and stuff... I mean, I thought that was all there was to it. But, as you know by now, that dry and boring testimony has turned into pages and pages of writing filled with emotions and amazing things God has done in my life. And that, I think, is how it should be... The road to salvation is... well, significant. But, it's what you do with your salvation that really matters. I mean, what if Paul's testimony ended with him getting his sight back? His life wasn't amazing b/c God audibly spoke to him and knocked him off his horse... It was how he lived his life after that was amazing. In the same way, I hope I can bless others with my life through the things that God has done for me, or has enabled me to do. So, now I just don't like sharing my testimony b/c I really suck at public speaking, but that's what this blog is for. :)

Still... Our praise team and PQ went down to one of the churches in North Carolina for a post-Grace rally. It was the first rally we've done in a lonnnng time. It was good... Some people felt kind of uncomfortable before going because it seemed disorganized, but it went really well. There weren't like, sermons... Instead, there were lots of testimonies shared. It was pretty cool to hear the pastors give their testimonies. I mean, we always like to hear them preach, but hearing how far they've come in God is always encouraging. But, hearing some of the kids give their testimonies was just really awesome. I mean, they're young, so there was not a whole lot to them, but to hear how excited and dedicated these youth kids are to God is extremely encouraging, and a good reminder about why we go through so much trouble to serve these kids. On the beginning of the first session on Saturday, I shared my testimony... I didn't have a whole lot of time to prepare for it, so I just read a modified version of the testimony I shared at Dongan. I included a little bit about the trip to Korea and also made it a bit more conclusive with one of the points I took away from the retreat. While I kind of mumbled a bit, the response was pretty great among the kids. I heard some ppl crying about halfway through it... And as PQ said, 'the atmosphere changed'... God's presence really showed up. So much so, Su just led an altar call right after and we went right into ministry time. While it is awesome that there was so much response to my testimony, it also meant that a lot of these kids had broken families and also struggle with depression and such... Youth these days need so much prayer! Anyways, the rest of the rally went really well, and it was great to see young hearts on fire...

The next day... I had to share my testimony at HOPE. Haha... This one, I felt, went over the worst. :P After chatting and stuff about my testimony to the praise team and PQ, I was trying to figure out how to tailor it to include more about Korea and make it 'more natural,' I guess, since these were all ppl I know. I figured HOPE would want to know more about my actual trip than my background, so I tried to pull a few highlights and reflections off my blog writings. I tried to blow through the beginning of my testimony so I could spend more time on the 'meaty' bits, but apparently, I spoke wayyyyy too fast, and Pastor Mimi ran up and told me to slow down a bit... Haha... But, I got through it, and then put up a little slideshow I threw together on the ride back from NC. The first few pics were like, you know, cultural things I did, but then I tried to include some stuff about the Holt trip and Ae Ran Won visit... Not really sure how that went over. I tried to speak off of the slides, and I hadn't slept much and my thoughts weren't really coming together. :P I wrapped it up (I think), and that was that... I kind of felt everyone was just looking at me, confused. Definitely not like at NC.

But, Pastor Q didn't actually preach a sermon. Instead, he spoke off of what I shared, mostly concerning reconciliation. Thankfully, he spent some time going over some of the points I was trying to make and really clarified/built on them. After, we had a little ministry time and there was a lot more response than I felt after I finished talking, so I guess I didn't make a complete hash of things. Goes to show, if God's gonna use you, He's really going to use you. I pray... well, first, that I'll get better at sharing things in person... But, obviously, that God will continue to use my story to help heal the hearts of those who have been through things similar to what I have.

Anyways... Life after the trip. I've got so many people to keep in touch with! I've been trying to keep in touch with my Seoul host family, Hyawnoo, Hyeonbee, Jun-Su (my orphan), the other adoptees, some of our translators... It's kind of hard, but Facebook is pretty helpful in that regard. Still, I wish I could do more. I need to learn Korean... I haven't been very good about studying any since getting back. :( I've been quite busy... Need to get on top my projects so I can squeeze in some Korean-learning-time! But, even so, I still should do my best to communicate with what I have to everyone... The last thing I want is for them to feel like I visited and then just took off.

As for the other adoptees... I just bought my plane ticket to fly back to Minnesota for the debriefing retreat on the 1st and 2nd of October. I'm pretty excited to see them again and hear how they've changed after the trip. Hopefully, it'll be nothing but good things... I know we're all missing Korea, and missing the people we've met. I'll probably put up a couple posts during/after that.

But...

Ok, ok...

What you, my faithful readers (and you cheaters who skipped all the parts about the trip) really wanna know about... Rebecca.

Ok, so like I said... When we said 'goodbye' that Friday night, all that was really for sure was that we would 'keep in touch.' Neither of us wanted a long-distance relationship. In fact, she had been burned by a previous relationship that went long-distance, and I know what my roommate has to go through with his long-distance relationship (in Japan)... But, still... You don't decide who you love. I was moping really, really bad when I got back. All I could think about was Rebecca, and how much I missed her. First... There was simply the fact that it started to get really good and then we had to say 'goodbye'... But, then, there was that uncertainty about our future.

However...

We chatted as often as we saw each other online. First on Facebook, then I made her get a Gmail account... Then we both got Skype up and running. After that Friday, our conversations got deeper and deeper. And... so did our feelings for each other. I stopped moping... And she stopped sleeping right. :S Yeah, we had hit a point of no return. Distance usually pulls new couples apart... But, even with the distance, we have become much closer. We're both in awe that it only took a week... And if you really think about it, it was really only a few hours... But, we're such a good fit for each other that there is no denying that more than chance is involved here...

So, August 18th, we made it official... We promised each other to wait, and then we would be telling other people that we had a girlfriend/boyfriend. Yeah, yeah... "It's not official until it's Facebook official..." Well, concerning that... She doesn't want to change our relationship status until we see each other face-to-face again. That might be forever, you think? Well, not really. More like a month. :P Yeah, you read that correctly... She's coming to visit. Not just to see me... But, also scout out the area and get job interviews... Because she wants to move here.

Just a little exciting?

Yeah... So... The future holds much for us. It's been roughly a month since we've got to know each other, but each day is still better than the last with her. Even without knowing all the details, we have the blessing of her parents, a lot of my friends, Pastor Q, Su, etc...

All I know is... A relationship has never felt so 'right' before. The odds are nutty, the challenges are... quite large... But, I am at peace with them. Many wonderful, sappy, probably-gross-you-out little details aside... This is the first girl I've met that makes me want to become closer to God. She gives me new hope in my life. All my previous relationships seemed to have pulled me away from God... And the same goes for the little 'interests' I had but soon stopped before anything happened with them... But, she's different. She points in the right direction... I feel blessed to have 'found' her. I mean, I can't really say I 'found' her... Things were kind of arranged too perfectly, if you catch my drift. God is teaching me about one of the other 'loves,' now... And I am soooo thankful.

So... There ya have it. Snake came back from Korea with a girlfriend... Ya'll were joking about it before I left, but God doesn't joke about these things. :)

'Til next time, from the debriefing retreat! Thanks for reading, all... :)