12/18/2011 Shameless Plug for KAMC... They need support, and they need publicity!

Well. Considering the reason any of this blog was written in the first place was because of the Korean Adoptees Ministry Center... I have no shame in making a post on this blog to support the program.

They need support in two ways... First, and most obvious, money. Like any program, funds keep the thing going. Second, they need adoptees to reach. Adoptees need to know the program exists! I just barely got word of the program... I mean, yeah, it was God's plan all along, but somebody still had to forward the e-mail to someone else who forwarded the e-mail to someone else, etc.

Pastor Mimi, my associate pastor at HOPE wrote a nice, short support letter that you can read here.

I wrote a longer, behemoth of a support letter in my style here...

And here is a general flyer for KAMC altogether.

If you've been financially blessed and you were blessed by my story... Please consider giving so that other adoptees might have the same opportunity that I did. Your money goes directly towards the airfare of the adoptees, not towards any part of the trip in Korea! The more money they have, the more adoptees can be sent. The churches in Korea support the rest of the program while in Korea.

Now, if you know any adoptees, or friends/family of adoptees... Send them this link to the application for the journey!! Send them the link to my blog so that they know what this is, and send the other links posted...

You can support this program a TON just by forwarding links... Send to friends, pastors, parents, people with extra money laying around, people with influence in the community, people who like to read, etc. You don't even have to give a penny, just a couple keystrokes and mouse clicks! But, of course, the program needs money, too... So, if you are feeling generous this holiday season, consider KAMC for your giving!

Thanks for bearing with me... I want to support KAMC the best that I can. I am indebted to them, and I want to see that ministry succeed.

11/27/2011 Some Catching Up, Some Plans and Some State of Mind

Wow! It's been two months since I posted last... Got some time now that Thanksgiving has rolled around. I have a lot to be thankful for this year, eh? So much...

But, how's life been for me? Well... Interesting! But, not exactly from a 'stuff is happening' kind of perspective, but from an emotional one, I guess.

Anyways, anyways...

I know I had been talking a lot about plans for the future with a lot of different people, but all sorts of things changed, and what was wanted wasn't always possible. Rebecca had planned on visiting, but that didn't pan out, and umma (I'm just going to call her 'umma' from now on to differentiate her from my adoptive mother) planned on bringing me back to Korea in time for my birthday, but she decided to wait a bit longer because of a few issues. Plans were pushed back to December, but we'll get to that.

Soooo... My umma sent me a big gift for my birthday.... It was the biggest gift I ever got!

My roommate was like, 'what the heck is in that box???' It was kinda heavy!

Lots and lots of goodies were inside...

 Tons of snacks...

So many tasty things!

My bro picked out some CDs to get me... All in good taste! As some of you know, I'm really picky about my music, but I liked every CD he got me. Good variety, and except for the Santana, they were all really good Korean artists. I thought Korea was all about the pop stuff, but they have some awesome indie bands, too.

And umma and bro went and got me some nice clothes from Uni Glo... I really needed some new threads, and I was pretty sad I couldn't get more from Korea while I was there. These clothes are all out of my 'usual' style, but I like them and wear them a lot when I go out now... Everybody says I look super-Korean. I'm happy... :)

So, that was really awesome, and I felt very loved. My umma was very obviously pressed to get this to me, because she was pressuring Rebecca to get my address and size and stuff, and she also paid a LOT of money to ship that enormous box. I don't think anyone's ever gone that far to get me a gift before!

Not too long after was the KAMC debriefing retreat. It was definitely a 'debriefing,' and a brief one (har har) at that. It was definitely really good to catch up with everyone again! David called out because of some emergency, so he wasn't there (that's all I'll say about that). We all met up at a TGIF, ate lunch and then headed off to the retreat center... We were kinda late, but Pastor Park and SMN were late, too, so it all worked out. We got an upgraded building, too. :)

The first thing we did was share some Powerpoint presentations we were supposed to have made beforehand from the trip. We were all a little bit confused on exactly how we were supposed to go about making them, and I did mine completely... wrong... Haha... Essentially, I shared what I shared as my second testimony at HOPE, which was all the events AFTER Korea. It was supposed to be 10 minutes long, but mine was almost an hour. :P It worked out, though, because right after I shared, we ate dinner and had a break, and a couple of the others had some time to finish up their presentations.

The others pretty much recapped the trip for them (which is what you were supposed to do)... It was good seeing how they took the trip. However, I know that they were all a lot more touched than just what they presented. Sadly, though, it seems like I'm the only one who's still really connected with Korea after the trip... But, then again, things happened miraculously fast for me. I hope and pray the others will get to experience what I did, eventually... Some plan on going back to Korea to teach English. I know for a fact, all of us really miss Korea, our host families and the friends that we met over there.

 We had Sunday service outside. :) It was a beautiful day... :)

And what would a retreat be without a little mischief? Haha...

We had some of SMN's home-cooked Korean food... For most of the others, it was the first time having Korean food in a lonnnnnng time. I am really fortunate to be in such a diverse area and to have my pick of Korean restaurants around... No, it's not the same as Korea, but it's nothing to complain about, either.

And how could we go without more group photos? Haha... Andy, Susan, Chyna and Melissa dropped by again to check up on us on Sunday.

The debrief really wasn't like... another 'retreat' kind of deal, but it was very focused on the practical aspect of continuing KAMC's ministry. We talked a lot about how to keep the adoptees involved. Most of the adoptees that go on the trip go, get blessed, come back home and then disappear... We discussed ways in which we'd try to keep involved. It's tough, because we're so spread out over the country, and not many of us know many other adoptees. And then we also talked on practical ways to improve the trip itself... We only had a few minor suggestions. Maybe add a day here, take a day away there... But, overall, we were still just blown away by how amazing the trip was. The biggest complaint was the tension between David and I... Which, I mean, you can't really do anything about, and that sort of... worked itself out, I guess.

Still... As much as I want to be involved in this program, things got BUSY not too much longer after I got back. I still owe KAMC a lot of writing... I need to get on it. But, I really, honestly, haven't had the time or energy.

So, that kind of brings me to the next bit... How's my life been recently? Well, let me tell you... My life is no fairy-tale. After my last entry, I guess you'd be led to think, 'oh, well, his life must be perfect now!' Haha... Far from it. I am still reeling from the consequences that I made earlier in my life when I didn't think I'd live to see 25 and thought 'spend everything/do what you want/live for the moment/that kinda thing,' and I still had to finish up with that 'incident' I got myself into before the trip. That was... humiliating and costly. And though things are looking up... finishing school and finally making my life stable... those things are kinda far away, I think. I'm still trying to manage a dead-end internship that doesn't pay anything, a draining weekend gig and a guitar-repair business that hasn't been doing much business... Add on top all the help with church, small group, etc, and I don't have a lot of time or energy for other things. I'm still riding my sportbike in freezing cold weather, rain or shine, and there are a couple issues with the house, still.

I mean, on the surface, it's pretty much life as it was before all this Korea-business, with the exception of my relationship. I really, really love Rebecca. I will hold on to her with everything I have... But, that makes long-distance even worse.  Long distance SUCKS and it is HARD. We talk everyday, at least once... But, just being able to talk is like dying of thirst in a desert, and just getting periodic drips of water. We've had some ups and downs, just like every relationship when it's just beginning, and the downs suck just as much as they would in a local relationship - maybe even worse, because miscommunication is more likely, and well, things are just worse over the phone (err... Skype). And it's not like you can just go over and check up on the other person... The only clue you have about what's going on on the other end is what you hear over the phone/Skype/IM/whatever. That brings about a whole new level of insecurities... And then the highs can only be so high... you know? I mean... Think. Five love languages. Words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service, gifts and physical touch... You pretty much only have words in full-effect, and even then, you can't use or see body language/facial expressions (no, we don't video chat). Quality time is... I mean, in person, you can spend quality time without saying anything to the other person and it'll be romantic... But, instead of being romantic, spending time over Skype without saying anything just ends up being awkward. :\ You can't really do 'acts of service' unless they are over e-mail or something, and gifts are well, pretty much in the same boat. And obviously, physical touch is impossible.

Still... despite all that, I am happier than I've ever been before. I am quite smitten, and Rebecca is one of the most amazing people I've met in my life, and I have the privilege of dating her (the others being ppl like Su, PQ, Pastor Steven Chandler, Caleb Quaye - I don't think I'd want to date any of them, though... hahahahaha). Our relationship, despite the long distance, is still amazing, and the thought of this only being 'the half of it' is just.. sublime. God has a reason for everything, and making us wait and learn about each other only through words is teaching us patience and tempers our trust in each other. We aren't ever, ever going to take time we spend together for granted... That's for sure. Long distance sucks, and it's hard, but I think it really boils the relationship down to the core of what actually holds the couple together and strengthens it. So, actually getting to be with her is going to be something like a dream...

Anyways, anyways... I'm sure you've heard enough about that. :P (If you were grossed out by that, wait until we get together... LOL...)

* ahem *

So, yes. I talked about things on the surface being like they were before Korea... But, I am so filled with hope and thankfulness that for the first time since well, forever, I feel like all of this 'trouble' is only temporary. This constant hustle for money to make ends meet, never having time for anything and the long-distance are all only temporary. So much hope! Yeah, sometimes I still get down/stressed about these things immediately in front of my face, but persevering is so much easier with the hope that I have. With the way that God has delicately planned and orchestrated the events this summer to come about, how could I not trust Him to take care of everything else in the future? He is not one to leave a work unfinished, and though He makes people wait now and then, He always keeps His promises. How long is the wait? Well, long enough for His purposes. Of course, I'm praying that He'll move things along sooner than later, but also that whatever changes and growth need to take place in the meantime WILL take place, and that I won't be resistant to them.

Alright, so back to my umma. She said that she'd fly me back to visit so I could be there on my birthday, but didn't... And she said she'd fly me back in December, but that's not going to happen... So, what's going on? Well, essentially, it's all on her business. October, she said, was the worst and most stressful month (end of the fiscal year kinda stuff, I'm assuming)... So she wanted to wait until December so she'd have more time and money for me. Well... business in November didn't go very well, and she was having trouble with one of the new branches out in the country-side, and it sounds like she had to invest personal money or something in it (not sure exactly). In the end, the funds just came up short; that's all.

Yeah, I mean, I was pretty disappointed... I mean, the three most important people in my life are in Korea, now. But, at the same time, I was also a tiny bit relieved (oh, I'd still rather have gone over, trust me)... I don't have my junk over here completely together yet, and I need to finish taking care of some stuff before I feel like I can 'leave' peacefully. But, more than that, I just need to trust in God's timing... Yes, my umma, bro, girlfriend and I are ALL very anxious about getting back together, but God has His reasons for everything.

Example? Well... I've already had a couple people ask, 'oh, well are you sure your mom really wants to see you?' or other crap like that... But, I think my umma is more disappointed than I am about the matter. She has missed me before I even knew that I was supposed to miss her. She has had 26 years of regret, compared to my few recent years of turmoil concerning my lack of knowing her. From the letters she has written me... I know she loves me... She is so sorry, and so regretful that I feel bad, almost guilty, hearing how sorry she is.

Eh. I wasn't sure about posting it, but I think I have to share... Here is her letter she hand-wrote me on my birthday:

Dear my loving son Chang Gi,

I have received your letter. I have read it a number of times.How foolish I was to have given you pain... how should I heal you... who is such tender and soft-hearted... my heart breaks. When I think about how many scars you may have in your heart, this foolish mom can't even look up the sky.

My loving son Chang Gi,

Do not be lonely anymore, do not be hurt, and smile.

Mom will protect you now. also for your dad.

My loving son Chang Gi,

I call your name many times a day. I miss you and I miss you, I want to hug you, I want to sing you lullaby, I want to touch each of your fingers and toes, I want to wash your face and hair, I want to give you a bath.

My baby, you are my baby. I love you, my baby! I get to celebrate your birthday for the first time now. I am sorry.Thank you for forgiving a mom like this. Thank you.

I thank Hye Won, and I also thank Pastor Park and Pastor Kim. How can I repay this favor?

My baby... Chang Gi... I love you.

Let's live to return the favor to the people who have given us love. I am preparing myself to attend church as you have wanted. I'll start going to church as soon as possible.

My loving son Chang Gi,

You have no seaweed soup, you have no cake, but do not be sad on your birthday. Next year I'll celebrate with you. I will try for sure.

My loving son Chang Gi,

Have a party with your friends on your birthday evening. Give my thanks to your friends as well. (Friends, thank you so much)

Your brother picked the snacks. He thought it would be to your taste. And we also bought clothes. He wants to give a change to your style. I am worried that it is cold there. Always take care of your health. Are the clothes your size? I do not know what to say. I am sorry. I am sorry, Chang Gi.

My loving son Chang Gi,

Your dad was a man of few words, and was a diligent man. He loved me very much. He took good care of the parents. He liked music a lot. He played 'I Love You Much Too Much' by Santata on my birthday. After that, I started to like the song a lot, too. Try listening to the song.

My loving son Chang Gi,

Happy Birthday. I miss you very much. I love you, my son. Be healthy always. OK?

P.S. - Wear your tights (underwear) when your wear pants. Always keep yourself warm.

To my son

From a foolish mom

Ok, how could you possibly say that that woman does not love me? The more I read that letter, the more I feel like crying...

When she finally determined that it wasn't going to be possible to bring me over in December, she felt so bad that she actually went to a Wednesday service at her local church, for the first time! By God's grace, she met somebody nice there who listened to her story (yeah, she cried hearing it) and decided she would look after umma at church. Turns out the church was having some sort of special 'event' or something and was having service everyday of the week... And my umma went to every one. She says that before, she had always been strong enough to take care of herself... so, she never really felt a need for God. But, now that she knows of me, but can do nothing to finally see me again, she feels humbled. There's a reason for everything, right?

Still... I say none of this is to belittle how much I want to meet my umma. I finally have a real mother now... I feel like parts of me grew up and matured way too fast... but, then another small part of me is a little boy who never grew up and is still looking for his mommy. I think about meeting my umma often... I imagine walking off the plane with all my junk, and seeing my family waiting for me. I doubt there will be any talk... just one long, long hug and lots of tears. I don't want to hold back... I will finally be able to cry on my mother's shoulder... All those years of suppressing my emotions and hardening my heart not to feel anything will just... dissolve. But, I think about it... I am a grown man. She is a little woman....... I wish, in some way, that I could be six years old and 3' tall again (or however tall I was when I was six), so I could run up to her and bury my face in her belly and cling to her, knowing that she is the strongest person in the world, and that she will protect me from anything... I have always lacked that. I still need that... I still think about it when I see the little kids in church fall over and go running to their mommies... Ever wonder why I don't really like touching people, or people touching me? Well, there's your answer. You're not my mommy. LOL... (Ok, ok, some comic relief was necessary.) No, but really. That's why, and I've always known it...

But, didn't I have my adoptive mother? Well... yeah. And I might have run to her when I was little... But, even back as faaaar as I can remember, I never felt completely comfortable doing it... It was strange. As soon as I didn't really 'need' to run to her, I stopped. I remember when I stopped calling her 'mommy' because I thought it was childish and I felt stupid. I was probably four or five. It was almost like... a business relationship or something. She played the role of mother and I played the role of son. I mean... watching other adoptee accounts and stuff... I don't know about them, but for me, I couldn't ever get over the fact that I looked nothing like my adoptive parents, and it was always, ALWAYS on my mind that they were not my real parents. I just felt like I had none. When I got to my teenage years and things really started to go sour (or I just realized what the crap was going wrong with my 'family'), they sort of turned into just... caretakers or something... and eventually just people I wanted to get as far away from as possible. The comparison of my adoptive mother and my umma is really like the comparison of the two women who came before King Solomon in the Old Testament... My umma loved me so much she gave me away... And my adoptive mother didn't care what would become of me; she only wanted to have a child. And it's so true... I went off to college... and that was it for her. She was never there to help me, or care for my needs, or even take time to figure out what my needs were... She just didn't care. I only existed to make her happy, not the other way around. Like a pet animal or something.

So... It's just past Thanksgiving. I used to hate Thanksgiving and Christmas, and Easter to some extent. Not because I'm a scrooge, or I dislike the purpose of those holidays (I certainly don't!), but because it was the time when I was reminded that all my friends, who I considered my 'family,' had more important people in their lives than me... That I always needed them more than they needed me. Depression would always subconsciously creep up on me when the holidays got near... I'd start to get depressed and not know why. Then it'd be the day of the holiday, and I'd wake up, wish myself a happy holiday and then sit around and wish I had a gun so I could shoot myself. Or maybe go find a tall building and jump... head first, or course. Or perhaps go speeding somewhere, take off the seat belt and crash head-on into a concrete wall. Or maybe make a speedball of chemicals and drown myself in alcohol. Nah, that never really works, and it'd suck to end up half-brained for screwing that up. But, really, I'd be so alone and just... dead... I wasn't energetic enough to motivate myself to do any of that. I just sat, with a sinking stomach, reading Xanga and forums and hearing about everyone else spending time with families. As you know, God eventually took depression from me... But, even after, I'd still always just be alone. Even if I went out with friends after they got 'free' from family stuff, or if I went to PQ's house to eat with his family and everyone else who was away from home... I still felt like a stray mutt, looking for some handouts or something.

But, now... Yeah, I spent Thanksgiving with just my roommates... But, just knowing that I have my umma and my bro... Those feelings are gone. I thought the only time they'd finally disappear would be when I made a family for myself... And who knows when that would be. I have a real mother now... I am still getting used to the idea, but signs of healing are already showing.

I guess, in a way, I've kind of had a long-distance relationship with my umma... I know my friends around me really love their moms, but they still complain about them, or front disgruntlement, or whatever. But, I will always, always cherish and be grateful for my umma... I will always be thankful for her, and I will always thank God that she is a strong, loving mother. Between her and Rebecca, I know the two most amazing women in the world... I've had to wait for both, and am still waiting, but the wait will be well worth it. I really can't wait to go back to Korea... But, God is helping me be patient.

On another note, concerning my return to Korea... I feel that God has some 'other' reasons for me going back, other than meeting my family and seeing Rebecca again. I feel that God has given me the 10 talents, and now I need to go and make something of them... To return a harvest from the seeds He gave me. I feel some conviction... But, it hasn't totally developed, and I don't really know what it'll look like panned out (but, when does anyone ever?). Still... just mentioning it now. I'll surely revisit this, eventually... But, I know my life is going to gain more purpose and His plans for me will be made more clear.

9/9/2011 5:21 PM Life Just Keeps Getting Better

Where to start?! Wow... God is... too good? Like, there is absolutely no way you can deny divine orchestration here... I feel normal. Not because nothing happened, but because SO much has happened, I think my mind just like, broke. My emotional system got a headache, said "screw it" and went in the back room to take a nap. It's almost surreal, except my fist still hurts from punching the stupid punching bag machine-game the other night. So... Yeah. 'Life changing' doesn't really begin to describe it.

I just went out and bought some energy drinks, candy and Flaming Hot Fries to celebrate and get this stuff blogged! :)

Ok, ok... So, I had my alarm set to wake me up at 7:30am. Rebecca was telling me that she planned on being at my mom's at 9am (my time, 10pm her's)... But, I got a text from her at 7:20am telling me that my bro would be picking her up in ten minutes... Yikes! So I got up, showered and cleaned up and stuff. As soon as I got to my computer, I literally just got her IM asking me to get on Skype.

Well, first... Tech didn't quite treat us very well. We were gonna video chat, but you can't video chat over Skype to a phone... So, it was all audio. We were kinda pressed, so we didn't bother sitting around and figuring that out. Then... The Skype call kept lagging and dropping and doing weird stuff. Conversation was kinda hard b/c we had to speak through Rebecca... She was IMing me the translation while my mom and bro talked on the phone. Not at all saying she did anything less than great, but I had to wait for translation and by the time I got it and wanted to say something, they were already talking about something else... Then when I wanted to say something, I had to type it to Rebecca and also try to say it at the same time (that's harder than you think).

Ok, well, that was kinda rough. It sort of made conversation a little awkward.... But............

But...

Gosh... I heard my mom for the first time... She grabbed the phone and was immediately crying and just said "Chang-gi' over and over... She told me that she was sorry; that she loved me and that she never forgot about me, even in her dreams. She said she had been praying for me, and that she loves me so much... She said that two days after she left me at Holt, she went back to go get me, but they had already sent me off to a foster home. She was weeping so bitterly... So kept calling me "son" and kept saying my name... She told me not to be lonely anymore, that she wanted to cook kimchi and bulgolgi for me. She wants to do my laundry; that she wants to do everything for me... She wants to make up for everything she couldn't do for me... She was worried about me being too skinny. She thought maybe I was sick... She told me to eat a lot of food. Then she called my bro a pig. :P Haha... Then she said I was more handsome than my brother, and tall and gorgeous... (Poor bro... Haha... ) She really wanted to hear my voice, so I just said 'umma...' She wanted me to say anything... Just make noises. Anything... I tried to say something... But, like I mentioned above, it was kinda difficult. She told me that she will see Hyewon (Rebecca) in place of me, and then said she was pretty. :) She said she always looked for me, that she misses me and that she regretted giving me up so much. She said she saw adoptees programs (where kids found their parents) and wished she could have a miracle like that. She said she could not imagine how alone I was, and how I struggled. She said she was sad beyond description...

And then...

My bro got on the phone said, "don't ride a bike!"

Hahaha....

He said, "thank you" for growing up and he was really happy to find me... And that I am not alone anymore, and that he'll always be there for me, and Hyewon will be there for me, too. He said that when he was young, he wanted to be successful so he could find me... (Note: My brother didn't know I existed until my dad was about to die, then he talked about me. After, my brother was really curious and wanted to find me.) And also... don't ride a bike! He said I was lucky to have found Hyewon, and that she was so pretty, and, "...man, you're a lucky guy!"

Mom got back on the phone and told me to eat. :P She said I worry her... Then she said I should be fat. :P She wanted me to tell her what I want to eat when we meet... I told her, "spicy food... Spicy Korean food!" and they all laughed... :)

Then my bro got back on the phone and told me he was gonna shave my mustache... Well, change my hairdo first. :P (I just got this junx cut, yo! Aiiii... Haha...) But, then he said my mustache was like my dad, so he would just trim it, not shave it. He said that we love each other and we can share everything. Like, music... We talked a little about X-Japan...  (Note: X-Japan is a famous, 80's metal-ish band from Japan... Kind of an 'acquired taste' kind of band, and I've actually never met another fan of X-Japan in person... But, fans are hard-core. When they broke up, many people committed suicide over the news!) He said that I was like 'another him'... Except we look different. Then my mom shouts that I look much better! Haha... They told me not to drink, and not to smoke... My bro said that when I go to Korea, he was going to give me his car! Not casually, either... He was really serious. (I really don't think I could take his car! Ai-ya... I will like driving it, though. :) I'm sure he tuned it well!) He said to just come... And mom would cook me a lot of Korean food... Then he said he wanted to take a shower together. :S (Note: In Korea, that's not weird... That's normal. Rebecca still found this amusing. :P I.... might... have to pass on that one... Haha....)

Then... (poor Rebecca) my mom started threatening Rebecca... She told her (and not casually) that if she breaks up with me, that she'll never get married... anywhere... :P Haha... (She actually did this several times that night, apparently... Hehehe...) She said if Rebecca breaks up with me and finds another guy, that she'll go to him and tell him what she did to me... Whelp. Rebecca's now stuck with me. Thanks, mom! :D

I asked my bro if he were dating... Then he said, 'yes' (sorry girls) but my mom had a disapproving look on her face... He said that mom only likes Rebecca... Haha...

They asked if I was safe from the earthquake and the hurricane. I told 'em that the earthquake was just a little shake, and the 'hurricane' was just a lot of rain. Then I told them that DC was pretty safe, and I don't speed anymore (well, it's only been a month, but hey. :P ) and that I never smoked, or did drugs... But do like beer. They were really relieved. I told them I always tried to be good, and I got good grades, and I was good to my parents. They were really happy to hear, and my bro said I was 'better than him'... Then he asked what I wanted for my birthday, and that he wanted to mail me something. Then he told me again, if I go to Korea, he'll give me his car...

I told them I just wanted to see them... That all I wanted was a guitar, the three of them in that room and nothing else...

Mom got back on the phone, and told me not to ride a motorbike. :P She said my bro got in trouble... (Turns out, my dad actually rode bikes, too! But something bad happened with him and he got rid of it/them...) Then she said my voice is the same as my bro's (mine's more deep, but his has the same 'softness' that mine does). She was in awe that we were raised in different environments but have managed to turn out so similar.

But, then she was saying how my personality is her's... She said that she is really a perfectionist; that she is obsessed with perfection. She said she could tell that I am the same by my work (last night, they went through all my Facebook pictures and were looking at my guitars and stuff). She said my sense of responsibility is from her, and that she knows that I have integrity because 'I am her.' She told me to call her 'umma'... She wanted to hear me call her 'umma' many times because I never had the chance to before... Then she asked if it were morning. She said that from now on, my body is her's, so I should be healthy. She said not to enjoy 'the speed,' that she enjoyed speed too (imagine that, my mom a speeder? Runs in the family!) but not to do it anymore... Then she told me to eat breakfast. :P

So... That's kind of where the conversation ends... (Had stupid Skype/internet troubles.) Rebecca told me that they were gonna get me a round-trip ticket to Korea, and they wanted to see me on my birthday! Woo-hoo! So soon... Guess I'm gonna get to Korea again before Rebecca comes here. Wooooow! I was praying someone would get me a ticket... Prayer answered!

Rebecca said that they were all actually in the office... Guess it was after hours, and my bro just brought Rebecca there. They took some pics w/Rebecca's iPhone.

 Umma at her desk... She's the director!

Rebecca was complaining that all the pictures were bad, b/c everyone's eyes were all puffy from crying so much... My stepdad was actually there for all of this, and he took these pics. More on him, later!

...But, she made everyone smile for this one. Doesn't she look cute next to my mom??? Also, don't my mom and bro look a lot more like me in this pic?

So... They took Rebecca out to eat lots of delicious Korean food. They wanted to stuff her on my behalf. My mom reallllly likes her. Rebecca said that they really treated her like a daughter. She said that she never felt that kind of love from a stranger, and that she really felt like she was family... I told her that that is how I felt the whole time I was in Korea with my host family and with the churches... I'm so glad she got to experience that! She said that the first conversation was a lot of crying and stuff, but dinner conversation was a lot of laughing... She said it was a really happy time. She said my family is really nice... She was telling me how my stepdad said if she ever wanted to eat some good food, that she should just call him up. She said my mom was really adamant about seeing her as frequently as possible (turns out Rebecca only lives 10 minutes away from their home! How perfect is that?)... And then she said my bro told her... If some guy follows her around, or harasses her, or hits on her, that he'd 'kick his ass'... Yeah, bro!!!! Rebecca is really pretty... And I know she's walking all over Seoul alone, so I worry about her, b/c I can't do anything 7000 miles away... So, this made me really happy. :) They are all really protective of me, and also really protective of Rebecca. Thankful for my bro! Thankful for all of them... I get a new family, and so does Rebecca. :)

Of all the things to give praise to God for... This one really tops it for me. My adoption papers stated my parents were Buddhist... And my bro is not a Christian.... So, I was worried about that... And I was really, really going to press that the only reason I got to meet my family, and that I am even alive, is because of Jesus. Well... As you can see in the conversation, I didn't really get a chance to say any of that... Last night, I was talking to Rebecca, and asked her if she would take my mom and bro to church if I talked them into going. She was unsure... She thought maybe it would be too soon, or even kind of rude to bring it up, but I still got her to agree. However... My Rebecca is amazing, and God is really just too good... At dinner, she was asked how she knew how to speak English so well. So, she shared her testimony about how God gave her her ability to speak English (yeah, you read that right)... And that opened their hearts a little. But, then she was talking about how we met, and how I had just gone on my trip to Korea. They asked how that happened and where I stayed, and she explained to them that it was all hosted and provided by church people. They were amazed! They were so surprised to hear how much good the church was doing, and when Rebecca was talking about CK and Youngchai, and how they hosted me for two weeks, they were really grateful and wanted to meet them, too... This opened their hearts even more... Then Rebecca told them, 'actually, Chang-Ji wanted you all to go to church...'

...

Their response?

Mom said she was actually thinking about going to church before all this! Now that this has happened, she seems really willing to go! I was thinking, you know, my mom would probably be willing to go because of all this... I mean, how can you deny that God was involved here? Like... Even if you say finding my family, which only happened because I found Rebecca, was just 'chance'... The only reason I met Rebecca was because I got to go to Korea in the first place, which was because of church people... Which, really, is because of God. So... yeah. But, my brother, though, I was a little worried about. You know, young and stuff... Thought maybe he might need a bit more time than mum. But, no! He was thinking about going to church, too!! God is just too good! Now that they know about me, and all this stuff just happened, they seem like they're gonna go! I can't believe it was so easy! It's like... God did all the hard work to make it easier for Himself - however that is supposed to make  any sense. :P Wow! I was so worried about that... I thought this was going to take time and effort... But, like Rebecca says, 'God is in a hurry these days...' Rebecca is so good... She set the conversation up just right to place 'church' in all this when I didn't get a chance. Man! Prayers answered right there... It's like, God, You are too good to Yourself! Haha...

But... Things get even crazier...

Ok, so, Rebecca, mom and bro have been getting a lot of spotlight... Let's turn our attention to the guy who was just watching... My stepdad. My stepdad is actually quite amazing. HE was actually the one who offered to buy my plane ticket. Mom and bro were discussing how they'd get me over there, and he just stepped in and offered to buy the ticket!

See... Before I left for Korea, my friends and I were all joking and fantasizing about all the good things that could happen while I was in Korea... Stuff like, you know... That I would find a wife... And that I would find my parents... And my dad would like, own a big company and be super-rich... And that I would get like, 'adoption reparations' or something... You know, just like, wishful thinking. Well, there is nothing too big for God... And those kinds of things are definitely within His realm of ability. But, you know... You kind of think that God's only going to give you doses of blessings here and there... You know, give 'reasonable' blessings. So... While things were really 'fantastical' while I was in Korea, and still even more so after finding my family, finding out that my dad had died ten years ago kinda brought me back to 'reality,' I guess. I mean, my parents were so poor they had to stick me up for adoption.

But, enter my stepdad. My stepdad actually owns the company that my mom works for... He used to own a  good-sized company (~150 people) and used to be really rich, but some things went down, and he had to downsize, so the company is about 30 people now. But, though he owns it, he still made my mom director! And... he is also still pretty well-off financially.... And he's also really generous, as you can tell by my mom getting the 'director' title when he owns the company. Well... Here's where it gets rich. So, my stepdad is a thoughtful, problem-solving kinda guy. He seems to have spoken in a practical manner the whole time, and he kept bugging Rebecca about whether I finished school or not. She kinda shied away from the question the first time, but eventually she told him I hadn't finished... He told her that he would support me until I finished school! He's gonna help me finish school! He said that he would help me graduate, then he'd help me get a job over in Korea and make some real money... He has connections with like, Samsung (don't quote me on this, I don't know details for sure, yet) and other big companies and can definitely help me get a real job. Many, many details and things to be worked out about that... But, he's willing. My adoptive stepdad never thought about that... My adoptive mom and my adoptive dad never thought about that... And here, my stepdad, is going to help me. I'm not even his kid! He owes me nothing! He only married my mom four years ago... He's got a son (who speaks really good English, and apparently is tall and skinny like me) and two daughters of his own (they all grew up and moved out already)... But, he's going to help me!

Can you believe it? Wow...............................

So... Let's go back to the beginning of this blog. First entry, all the way at the bottom, under 'Some Prophetic Thingers.' I was talking about how Pastor Shin was prophetically praying over me, and he said that 'God would restore all the things that were taken from me and destroyed'... Well, BAM. There ya have it. God is not a liar! This year... God has given me the experience of a lifetime in Korea... He has shown me how unconditional His love is... He has shown me grace. He has shown me mercy. He has blessed me with surrogate families in Korea... He has blessed me with an amazing, beautiful (hot) girlfriend. He has restored my family... He has given me the best friends ever to celebrate all this with... And now... He has made a way for me to finish school and get on with my life.

When my mom was telling me that she loves me, and that she never forgot about me, even in her dreams... I really felt like God was saying the same thing to me. All those times I was depressed and begging God to tell me where He was... All those times I was really on the edge, the end of my rope... God is now telling me that He was there. He never forgot me... He loves me... And now that those times have passed, He is going to do everything for me... He is going to 'make it up' to me...

Can I have an 'amen?' A 'hallelujah?' My God... is surely too awesome... Too amazing... Everything... I mean, everything... was gone before. I have done nothing... I can take credit for none of this. All the glory, all the praise and all the goodness to my one, true, loving Father... Wooooo!! What's better? There is more to come! God is not finished!!

Exciting times in the life of Snake... :) I'll keep ya posted. :)

9/9/2011 12:07 AM My Dad

Ok, well, not too much too big happened last night... But, Rebecca got some pictures of my dad!

This was taken just the other day. My mom and bro went to go visit my dad's tomb... That's my mom! 

And... do I really have to say that's my dad? Like... My mom was kinda a surprise, but, wow...

I kept staring at all of our pics in different windows and got fed up, so I put together a little family collage... Isn't it something?

Well, in a few hours... I will be speaking to my mother and my brother for the first time... Time to get some good sleep and get ready for this!!

9/8/2011 12:56 PM My Bro

Ahhhh... So much to write about!

I am so happy these days... So happy that I feel like all the stuff I went through earlier, all the struggles I have, like... didn't even happen. I keep hearing bits and pieces from Rebecca about my mom and my brother... Gosh, I love my mom so much already... And she is protective of me, too. Poor Rebecca... She told her, kinda sternly, that she better not break up with me and that she should 'be nice to me'... Haha... Now, she's stuck with me. :) I am so thankful... Even in my informal tone and array of vocabulary and expressions, I really can't describe how I feel right now... It sounds stupidly obvious, but I really do feel like I just 'found my family'... I mean, I guess it's possible to meet your family and maybe feel like they're not your 'family' but just your 'creators?' I have no idea... After watching so many accounts of other adoptees meeting their parents, sometimes adoptees end up experiencing a 'second loss' upon meeting their parents. Not so with me... I am... I feel more complete, or something.

Some 'boring' details first... Well, my case worker at Holt sent me an e-mail with some more details about things.  She told me that she used some government resources to find their contact info, and that they came to visit on the 6th. She gave me a couple more details that I didn't get before... My father had hepatocirrhosis, and while he recovered after I was adopted, he still had liver issues and died of liver cancer 10 years ago. But, four years ago,  my mom married another guy, and my brother still lives with them. In any case, both my mom and brother hand-wrote me a letter and my case worker scanned them and sent them to me. Of course... Now I have Rebecca, and they know this at Holt now, too... So, I guess I'm done with them? We'll see if there are any formalities, but I don't think they can do much else for us, now... Rebecca is going to translate the letters for me. She already got to read them... I mean, she cried reading them... So, I'm probably gonna need some tissues. :P I don't think I cried this much my whole life! :P Snake is getting soft...

But, Rebecca got to talk to my mom on the phone this time... She was actually the one who asked Rebecca to translate it. She cried a lot... Especially after finding out I was always the only Asian growing up and stuff. She cried enough to make Rebecca cry, too... :P She said she couldn't imagine how lonely and tough it must have been for me. I know she struggled too... But, I am so happy to have found them now, that I don't really care about what's been done... I just want to be with her... Anyways, she was very pressing on meeting Rebecca, so Rebecca is actually going to go meet them tomorrow. She's going to set up a Skype call, and I'm going to get to talk to my mom and my brother for the first time...

How do I feel? I'm... excited... nervous... I dunno. It's... like, what do you expect? What can you expect? I just know I have to...

Rebecca is also excited... But, seems like she's even more nervous than I... She feels like she's under a lot of pressure, since this is pretty important stuff. I am so grateful for her and her willingness to make things work... Since this post is live, it'd be cool if you wanna lift up a quick prayer for her. I'll be praying for her, too (duh)... She's in a pretty clutch position, admittedly... Still, there is no person I would rather have in her position right now. I definitely want her by my side when I meet them in person....

But... In the meantime, I got some more info on my brother. He's like... exactly like me... Except much better looking. :P I friended him on Facebook, and got some more details from Rebecca...

He looks like a freakin' K-movie star or something... :S Not fair...!! Haha... But, that's what he said when he learned how tall I was.... But, really... He got all the looks in the family! Ahh... My dad must have been the one responsible for my complexion. :( Haha... I feel like I got the shallow end of the gene pool. :P Also, all the girls on his friend list all look like movie stars or something. It doesn't look like a normal friend list, but more like a K-pop directory or something. :S Dag... Sensitive-Personal-Whine-Moment: I always thought I was like, really ugly until I got my first girlfriend... Then I thought maybe I was just average. But, I have a beautiful mom, and my brother is already making my female friends drool... So... * shakes fist at dad *... Haha... Anyways, maybe if I 'Korean-ize' a little more, I'll get there, too.

Well, from the last post, you know he's into car tuning... But, he's also really into rock music! He was the singer for a rock band... Rebecca was telling me how he said he felt like he wanted to cry when he was looking through my photos on Facebook and saw my guitars. Crazy... If you don't know, Koreans aren't really into car-tuning b/c the government laws were previously very strict about that kind of thing... And then Koreans are usually 'softies' when it comes to music, so rock fans are pretty rare. So... The fact that he likes these things is really something else. He really likes spicy food, too... Rebecca said that when she told him that I really like spicy food, he said, "that dude must be my bro!" :)

I've never really met anyone like me, ever... All my car friends are different... All my art friends are really different... Same for my music friends, and my Korean friends, etc, etc. But, my brother is just like me! I feel like I just met my best friend. Both my brother and mom say that I get all that arty, fixing and tinkering stuff from my dad... I always thought hobbies and stuff were environmentally developed... But, I guess maybe some of these things can be programmed into your blood, somehow.

In a sort of weird way... I think I might have it easier than some other adoptees who meet their parents. I am so disconnected from my adoptive parents that when I see myself, I see myself as an orphan. I don't (well, didn't) feel like I had parents... So, in that sense... Now that I am meeting my mother and my brother... I feel like I'm being reunited with my family, and am not 'torn' between birth and adoptive parents. It's a really confusing experience for adoptees, and adoptive parents get really jealous and protective... But, I don't have to deal with any of that. I've found my umma... It's as simple as that.

9/7/2011 11:07 AM An Update... Quite an Important Update, at That...

Well..... I woke up this morning to the surprise of my life... I was barely awake, and checked my computer to look something up really quick, and Rebecca IM'd me: "Daniel... I found your brother."

Wow... It took a moment for the surprise to settle in.

Just last night (our night), I had asked her about my brother's name. I had tried finding him on Facebook before, but no luck. I was searching only using English... I thought maybe I should try using Hangul. But, I wasn't sure what the Hangul was, so I had asked Rebecca. She gave me the correct characters, but then did a search on Cyworld for 'Huh Chang-Wook' (in Hangul, obviously). She msg'd every guy that came up that was about our age... This was just last night... She got some responses, but nothing concerning me.

But, this morning (her evening), she got back to me... She had talked to my brother on the phone! She asked some good questions... And got my brother's Cyworld and mini-page and stuff. She got some pictures, too...

So... My mother is healthy and well, and it seems my brother is doing well, too. My father, though, passed away when I was 15-16 (maybe even 17? Gotta get clarification on the age). I kind of had a feeling about that... But, Rebecca was able to send my brother some pics of me. He says I look a lot like my father! He apparently looks a lot more like my mother, though. They were really excited to hear about me and glad to hear I am ok and not angry at them. Haha... And then they were asking about her! Funny...

So, she is going to go visit them. They live in Seoul, about 20 minutes away from where I was staying! She's gonna go visit during Chuseok and give them some gifts and talk. She gets to meet my parents first! Kinda funny, but she gets to meet my parents before I do.

So... Pictures!

That would be my brother... I don't have a more recent pic yet, but should get plenty, soon. He definitely looks like my brother! I looked quite similar when I was that age. ...And that would be my mom. She was hot! Haha... Somebody already asked, 'so, what happened to you?' :P

Not sure how recent these next two pics are... But, that's my mum. First... She looks nothing like I would have thought... My first thought was, 'I don't look anything at all like her!' And second, she looks younggggg... I know these pics might be a little older... But, she should be 48-49 now! But... That is my mom... You shouldn't have to wait 25 years to see your mom for the first time......

She looks like a college student! She is very pretty... I felt shock at first... I was expecting like, an old, wrinkled ahjumah or something... I guess that's how most adoptees find their parents? But, 48-49 really isn't that old... And... well, she looks young! I still can't believe she is my mom... But, that's her...

I post this pic b/c it's a pretty straight-on pic of my face... There is some resemblance (even if it's only a tiny bit), don't you think? Just a little. But, in hearing that I look mostly like my dad... I really want to see what he looked like... My brother said I was tall and handsome... I can't wait to hear more about my mom...

And, if you know me, this will make you laugh... But, this is my brother's car! He's really into car tuning!!

It looks pretty good! Tastefully done, thankfully... Haha... I hear he designs jewelry, and he's kinda artsy, too.

If you don't know me that well, well, here was my car:

Blood is thicker than water, no? Wow... Just wow... (If you're wondering, I'm sure my car woulda whipped his! Hehe... Then again, he didn't blow his up. :P )

Anyways... I was on Skype with Rebecca when I looked at these pics... I am so thankful for her, and for God just doing things the way He does. How perfect could it be? We're both shocked at how quickly He is moving... My excitement is sky-high, and my emotions are all over the place... Definitely a day to celebrate!

God willing, I hope I can get a chance to visit soon...

Well... I will be updating as things go along... So, this blog isn't ready to be closed any time soon. :)

9/6/2011 1:30 PM Life as it Goes On...

Well... It has almost been a month since leaving Korea... Life has almost returned to 'normal' - I mean, it's work-work-work, again. Some things are remarkably different. :)

Right after the trip, I had a bit of reverse-culture shock as soon as I landed in Georgia on layover. I was first shocked to see so many black people... And then shocked to see how much bigger Americans are. :S It was... a weird feeling. But, then I was also taken by how rude everybody seemed. As soon as I got home and I sort of got situated again, I went off to a wedding reception (Lisa &  Colin's). I was still really sad about leaving everybody in Korea, and then with my new disgust at being back home, I really needed to see my friends again. I put on my sharp, new suit from Dongdaemun and rode my bike over to the after party (it was so late, I didn't make it to the reception). I walked in and was promptly greeted by a stream of 'booooo's from BFF'ers (my church small group)... Haha... Everyone was complimenting how good I looked in my suit and was asking lots of questions about Korea. I was really happy to see everyone again, but I was really moping (more on that, later), so it was probably tough for anyone to tell. Had church the day after, and I think seeing all my friends and church family got me over the culture shock pretty quickly. The jet-lag, though, was a completely different story. That took like, two weeks to get over...

Before all of this, I really hated 'sharing my testimony' because I felt like it was really dry and boring... About how I grew up in church, thought I accepted Christ at six or something, then later had to rededicate myself and stuff... I mean, I thought that was all there was to it. But, as you know by now, that dry and boring testimony has turned into pages and pages of writing filled with emotions and amazing things God has done in my life. And that, I think, is how it should be... The road to salvation is... well, significant. But, it's what you do with your salvation that really matters. I mean, what if Paul's testimony ended with him getting his sight back? His life wasn't amazing b/c God audibly spoke to him and knocked him off his horse... It was how he lived his life after that was amazing. In the same way, I hope I can bless others with my life through the things that God has done for me, or has enabled me to do. So, now I just don't like sharing my testimony b/c I really suck at public speaking, but that's what this blog is for. :)

Still... Our praise team and PQ went down to one of the churches in North Carolina for a post-Grace rally. It was the first rally we've done in a lonnnng time. It was good... Some people felt kind of uncomfortable before going because it seemed disorganized, but it went really well. There weren't like, sermons... Instead, there were lots of testimonies shared. It was pretty cool to hear the pastors give their testimonies. I mean, we always like to hear them preach, but hearing how far they've come in God is always encouraging. But, hearing some of the kids give their testimonies was just really awesome. I mean, they're young, so there was not a whole lot to them, but to hear how excited and dedicated these youth kids are to God is extremely encouraging, and a good reminder about why we go through so much trouble to serve these kids. On the beginning of the first session on Saturday, I shared my testimony... I didn't have a whole lot of time to prepare for it, so I just read a modified version of the testimony I shared at Dongan. I included a little bit about the trip to Korea and also made it a bit more conclusive with one of the points I took away from the retreat. While I kind of mumbled a bit, the response was pretty great among the kids. I heard some ppl crying about halfway through it... And as PQ said, 'the atmosphere changed'... God's presence really showed up. So much so, Su just led an altar call right after and we went right into ministry time. While it is awesome that there was so much response to my testimony, it also meant that a lot of these kids had broken families and also struggle with depression and such... Youth these days need so much prayer! Anyways, the rest of the rally went really well, and it was great to see young hearts on fire...

The next day... I had to share my testimony at HOPE. Haha... This one, I felt, went over the worst. :P After chatting and stuff about my testimony to the praise team and PQ, I was trying to figure out how to tailor it to include more about Korea and make it 'more natural,' I guess, since these were all ppl I know. I figured HOPE would want to know more about my actual trip than my background, so I tried to pull a few highlights and reflections off my blog writings. I tried to blow through the beginning of my testimony so I could spend more time on the 'meaty' bits, but apparently, I spoke wayyyyy too fast, and Pastor Mimi ran up and told me to slow down a bit... Haha... But, I got through it, and then put up a little slideshow I threw together on the ride back from NC. The first few pics were like, you know, cultural things I did, but then I tried to include some stuff about the Holt trip and Ae Ran Won visit... Not really sure how that went over. I tried to speak off of the slides, and I hadn't slept much and my thoughts weren't really coming together. :P I wrapped it up (I think), and that was that... I kind of felt everyone was just looking at me, confused. Definitely not like at NC.

But, Pastor Q didn't actually preach a sermon. Instead, he spoke off of what I shared, mostly concerning reconciliation. Thankfully, he spent some time going over some of the points I was trying to make and really clarified/built on them. After, we had a little ministry time and there was a lot more response than I felt after I finished talking, so I guess I didn't make a complete hash of things. Goes to show, if God's gonna use you, He's really going to use you. I pray... well, first, that I'll get better at sharing things in person... But, obviously, that God will continue to use my story to help heal the hearts of those who have been through things similar to what I have.

Anyways... Life after the trip. I've got so many people to keep in touch with! I've been trying to keep in touch with my Seoul host family, Hyawnoo, Hyeonbee, Jun-Su (my orphan), the other adoptees, some of our translators... It's kind of hard, but Facebook is pretty helpful in that regard. Still, I wish I could do more. I need to learn Korean... I haven't been very good about studying any since getting back. :( I've been quite busy... Need to get on top my projects so I can squeeze in some Korean-learning-time! But, even so, I still should do my best to communicate with what I have to everyone... The last thing I want is for them to feel like I visited and then just took off.

As for the other adoptees... I just bought my plane ticket to fly back to Minnesota for the debriefing retreat on the 1st and 2nd of October. I'm pretty excited to see them again and hear how they've changed after the trip. Hopefully, it'll be nothing but good things... I know we're all missing Korea, and missing the people we've met. I'll probably put up a couple posts during/after that.

But...

Ok, ok...

What you, my faithful readers (and you cheaters who skipped all the parts about the trip) really wanna know about... Rebecca.

Ok, so like I said... When we said 'goodbye' that Friday night, all that was really for sure was that we would 'keep in touch.' Neither of us wanted a long-distance relationship. In fact, she had been burned by a previous relationship that went long-distance, and I know what my roommate has to go through with his long-distance relationship (in Japan)... But, still... You don't decide who you love. I was moping really, really bad when I got back. All I could think about was Rebecca, and how much I missed her. First... There was simply the fact that it started to get really good and then we had to say 'goodbye'... But, then, there was that uncertainty about our future.

However...

We chatted as often as we saw each other online. First on Facebook, then I made her get a Gmail account... Then we both got Skype up and running. After that Friday, our conversations got deeper and deeper. And... so did our feelings for each other. I stopped moping... And she stopped sleeping right. :S Yeah, we had hit a point of no return. Distance usually pulls new couples apart... But, even with the distance, we have become much closer. We're both in awe that it only took a week... And if you really think about it, it was really only a few hours... But, we're such a good fit for each other that there is no denying that more than chance is involved here...

So, August 18th, we made it official... We promised each other to wait, and then we would be telling other people that we had a girlfriend/boyfriend. Yeah, yeah... "It's not official until it's Facebook official..." Well, concerning that... She doesn't want to change our relationship status until we see each other face-to-face again. That might be forever, you think? Well, not really. More like a month. :P Yeah, you read that correctly... She's coming to visit. Not just to see me... But, also scout out the area and get job interviews... Because she wants to move here.

Just a little exciting?

Yeah... So... The future holds much for us. It's been roughly a month since we've got to know each other, but each day is still better than the last with her. Even without knowing all the details, we have the blessing of her parents, a lot of my friends, Pastor Q, Su, etc...

All I know is... A relationship has never felt so 'right' before. The odds are nutty, the challenges are... quite large... But, I am at peace with them. Many wonderful, sappy, probably-gross-you-out little details aside... This is the first girl I've met that makes me want to become closer to God. She gives me new hope in my life. All my previous relationships seemed to have pulled me away from God... And the same goes for the little 'interests' I had but soon stopped before anything happened with them... But, she's different. She points in the right direction... I feel blessed to have 'found' her. I mean, I can't really say I 'found' her... Things were kind of arranged too perfectly, if you catch my drift. God is teaching me about one of the other 'loves,' now... And I am soooo thankful.

So... There ya have it. Snake came back from Korea with a girlfriend... Ya'll were joking about it before I left, but God doesn't joke about these things. :)

'Til next time, from the debriefing retreat! Thanks for reading, all... :)